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Friday, 16 August 2013

THE ESSENTIAL SENSUAL EGO MASSAGE

Today let’s talk Beauty and Wellbeing: it’s so in vogue!
We are all running off to massages, saunas, soaking up essential oils, electric shock thingies and being pampered and pummeled into wonderful shapes.
We pay enormous amounts of attention (and money) to our breasts, legs, thighs and (sigh) bottoms.
But let me ask you a question: what are you doing for your ego?

Because unlike a sinewy butt, a thin ego is NOT good.
No, not at all. WE want big, fat, juicy, lusciously sensual egos, with lots of dimples.
We need to pamper our egos, feed them spiritual chocolate and cream éclairs with caramel ice-cream on the side. We want deep muscle massage on our egos, we want to adore ourselves…

So how should we do this?
I have a plan (I’m one of those irritating people who always has a plan, or an opinion; failing that I make a list).

Step one: Tell yourself how marvelous you are every single morning. Smile charmingly at yourself , blow kisses at your mirror. Flirt with yourself. See just how enormously sexy and seductive you are, you beauty!

Step two: Write yourself a love letter detailing how passionately in love you are with yourself and why.

Step three: Take lots of pictures of yourself with your cell-phone. Share the wealth…send them to all your admirers.

Step four: Don’t keep it a secret: smile at everyone you meet in the same way…flirty, mysteriously.

Step five: Hang out with people who agree with you.

Step six: Stop right there….Sing “I feel pretty” from West Side Story out LOUD!

Step seven: Fling open the window and throw your arms out wide. Scream: It’s a wonderful world cause I’m in it!

See?
Doesn’t that feel amazing?
Next time we will talk about “Modern Solutions to the Permanent Removal of Unsightly hair and Sundry Relatives”.

I just love myself…Don’t you?

Manuela Cardiga

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